The Midwestern NY takeover!

I have une petite guilty pleasure in following the gossip and trendy cat-fights of the New York City socialites – the closest the US will ever come to royalty. The last few weeks, its been the typical bashing of benefit outfits and marital playoffs. A run-down on my not-so-secret way inside the minds of these keys to eternal happiness through valentino are websites like park ave peerage, gawker, socialite rank (now defunct), new york social diary, and the like. i read mostly for the pictures of high fashion and the occational whitty commentary. But the hidden gold in these websites are the comments posted by “readers” who are, in fact, the socialites themselves – chatting back and forth at each other over horrible fashion missteps, calorie counts, engagement party guestlists, and all around bad b*tching. It also does wonders for my self-esteem and work-driven midwestern upbringing – I still find it laughable sad how devoid of actual life these “have it all” girls and gay boys are.

But then, as if the hollywood gods had finally found a way to take over the blaze high rollin’ life of these Park Ave {insert clever royalty pun here}, the social “scene” losts its mind over the explosive finale of the online socialite networks, as a NY Magwriter played fashionable hardy boy to the mystery that was the masterminds behind these sites that had New York PYTs wrapped around their judgemental little fingers. In summary of this indepth research project – the uncomfortably questionable lovey russian bro-sis duo on the fringe of NY society had created Socialite Rank as a cyber-hair-pulling-and-nail-scratching fight as revenge for their dismiss from the inner circle (all the cliche metaphores i am using here are making me cringe – all the better for effect). So blah blah that was no surprise, trying to put down those that had kept them down. Ruthless and extreme but {yawn}. But, like any great prime time soap opera writer that keeps their audience yearning for more over the top antics and unconcievable situations, the twist does not come until page 8 of this 8 page headlined news story. After Socialite Rank hung its highlighed and weaved head and went off the web, eyed turned to an equally explosive site, Park Ave Peerage, full of never-before-seen pictures of the Trump Princess out on the town, socialites tanning in the Hamptons, and color-coordinated family photo shoots for seashell-clad frames at the summer house in Nantucket. People (nay, not people, socialites) wondered who was posting these intimate photos that actually make these ladies and queens look….normal?? Are you ready for the twist? an 18 year old freshman boy at the University of Illinois.

Is there really anything left to say? This midwestern Indian immigrant dude sitting in his dorm had infiltrated the glass case of [fake] emotion that surrounds the fortress of New York. He has brought the future leaders of charity balls around world to tears. Just read the comments on his site after the cat was out of the bag. The girls are speechless as well. This dude stole Anna Wintour’s show as table after table at the Met Institue Costume Gala cheersed to his brillant research and classy commentary. To keep from crying over the fact that they can no longer continue to ignore the fact that they live among us midwestern homegrown kids and that we are as much real to them as they are to us.

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